I pretty much start to fixate on Candy Corn in late September.  It taunts me from my beloved seasonal aisle in CVS.  My costume concept deliberations begin in May, this year on the short list is Hall and Oates, Sushi, and a Kathy Griffin’s Mother. (tip it!)  My pumpkin sits and waits patiently on my table until it is time to do a costume change, and become Jackie O Lantern.  The seeds get roasted on tinfoil in my oven, as the “Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown” special plays on my TV.  I love Halloween!

The one piece of Halloween I don’t indulge in so much is that scary part, the dark, the dismal, the spooky.  That’s about to change.  Welcome to this year’s:

Halloween Post of Scary and Bad artwork for Nurseries and Children!!

Please note: ALL of the artwork below is currently actually and seriously being sold as artwork for nurseries and childrens rooms.  Please proceed with caution.

Mwah HA-HAhaaaaaaaaa!

First up, is a series of painting that I would title “Dreary Toys in Swamps”

This is one depressing tricycle. Makes me cry a little on the inside.

PLANE DOWN! Can you say "melancholy"? Notice the drop shadow below it, which only leads me to believe it has landed onto a see of sad split pea soup.

While on the theme of transportation……

This image is so confusing. I see the bicycle, the sideways guitar.... on the bottom right hand side of the image- are those pentagram stars?

Do NOT MESS with this ROO! She is packin' a blade in her pouch and she will cut you!

These lollipops look like Conjunctivitis. See image below.

This eye reminds me of that weird painting of Lollipops. See image above. Please note, DO NOT EVER type the word Conjunctivitis into Google's Image search. You will be sorry.

Most rabbits are cute and adorable cotton tailed friends.  The two below are possessed.  They are zombie bunnies who, if given the chance they will most likely eat your brains.


While on the topic of eating brains....and is he about to bite her? This is just wrong on way to many levels.

If the eyes are the window to the soul, what is the meaning when an artist decides to leave off the entire face?  Beware of the spooky collection of Boollerinas below.

another creepy faceless Bellerina, her legs make her look sickly.

While on the topic of Ballerinas, there are A LOT of Ballet themed art out there, most of it is sweet and saccharine “dreckitude”.  BUT- the ballet bar was really raised or lowered in this case with the piece of….let’s call it decor?  below.

So many questions! Where is the rest of her body? Why do her feet look like a pair of french baguettes? Is this mounted on an open Torah?

Depressing Fashions as a theme for Little girls!

Take a gander at the drabtastic looks below, for the mother who wants her daughter to grow up to be frumpy.

That extended hand really says "style"!

This shoe is from the Janet Reno Glamor Collection.

The Painting below of Mermaids in Hell, reminds me of a Rubens Masterpiece!

This one's title is "Mermaid Tea Party" Now people, how would tea stay in a mermaids cup, if she is underwater. Secondly, some of these mermaids are clearly drowning. However compositionally it reminds me of the Peter Paul Rubens masterpiece below.

Peter Paul Rubens "Massacre of the Innocents" 1621

Another compositional mess awaits you below.  Its an exterior view of a home that looked really familiar to me!!

This is what the homestead look like on the outside, for a peek behind the walls of this home scroll down.

Hoarders!

Animals are a favorite theme for Nursery artwork, below are some examples.

Look closely at this very lazy piece of work. Why do the elephants have 2 heads and only one body?

In this painting, we see that the Lion is about to pounce! By the look on the Zebra's face it's evident he knows it!

Poor mixed up mutt. Do you think Uli from Project Runway had anything to do with this?

This Monkey, is one step away from being a skeleton, and the top part of her head looks like a bootie.

This is a one of a kind baby monkey doll, Thank goodness.

Wishing everyone a very Happy Halloween!

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About Sam Simon

Sam Simon is a beloved NYC artist and designer - creating beautiful murals and paintings on canvas. Sam launched a boutique line of limited edition artworks in 2007, and a line of lighting in 2009. Check out www.samsimonprojects.com or follow sam on twitter @ http://twitter.com/1samsimon
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